So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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