Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
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