Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
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Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
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IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize