i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
