i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Boobs are out for the taking
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
