It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
