it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
