please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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