Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
