Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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