the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
