Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
