she was so not down for the gang bang
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
