Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
