508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
