Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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