I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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