Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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