the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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