Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass

Fav 14 4152 1304
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(320): View more from Minnesota

Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...

Fav 56 1724 4474
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Drinking in an igloo changes everything.

Fav 37 6928 923
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(936): View more from Texas

You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.

Fav 18 2401 6969
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(816): View more from Missouri

why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011

Fav 9 2572 1188
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(416): View more from Toronto

He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ

Fav 16 5196 1372
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(936): View more from Texas

You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.

Fav 13 4203 1195
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(716): View more from New York

My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.

Fav 6 174 358
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(210): View more from Texas

God gave you your own nipples for a reason.

Fav 0 49 6
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