Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize