i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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