is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
We have so much sex to catch up on
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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