If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
