I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize