your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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