just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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