The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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