First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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