I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
