spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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