walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
