i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
