Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
