i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
