I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
