your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
