I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
