Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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