I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
wow bdsm is so cute
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
