I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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