Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize