you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
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he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
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I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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