you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?