TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize