You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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