lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
