My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize