Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
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