i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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