Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Jerry, you need to find god
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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